I remember being 17 and so lost in the whole “sex” thing. Everyone around me seemed to get it — or at least pretended to — and there I was, uninterested, uninspired, and completely uneducated. A late bloomer, apparently. I just wasnt experienced in that field. 

I did the “responsible” thing — got on birth control — but beyond that? There was no beyond that.

I had sex for the first time at 17. It was trash.
It stayed trash for the next five years.

I kept expecting something magical to happen because AOL (yes, AOL) told me 15% of women can’t climax. So, naturally, I assumed I was in that unlucky 15%. I gave up trying. I convinced myself, “It’s all about him.”
I literally said that out loud: Yes, I hear how dumb that sounds now lol. 

But at the time, I didn’t know better.
No one around me did either.
My friends were just as clueless.
We also didnt have iphones or Dr. ChatGPT. 

We dont give thought to those girls. The "unguided" girls who have to just "figure it out". 

At 18,  I met a woman six years older than me. She came into my life for a reason and a season — and thank the universe for that season.

She taught me how to shave. Everywhere. 
She introduced the idea of boundaries — lightly, but enough to plant the seed.
She was the first to see the spark leave my eyes when my heart was broken.
She guided me through pregnancy and becoming a mother.
She was the spine I hid behind until I could grow my own or at least start to collect the pieces.

She has no idea what she means to me, even now. 

Then came D — another powerhouse. We were the same age, both juggling kids, money, time, and sanity. Somehow, we made it work. I look back at what we pulled off together, with zero time and even less money.... we were unstoppble. Even if that meant decorating the backyard at 4am, there wasnt anything we couldnt tackle. She helped build my confidence, allowed me to be me, and we were the definition of strength. She got me through working 100 hours a week and I got her through divorce. It worked. 

I wouldnt have gotten this far in life without her being a pivotal piece early on. 

Next, J — the woman I watched rise like a phoenix from the ashes. Strength in human form. She was my army of one when I had none. I got to watch her rebuild an entire life, with 3 kids all by herself. She held all of my pieces together when no one else bothered to see that I was falling apart. We dont talk as much as we used due, but I have never known the "old" feeling of alone since I met her. At times, I still feel lonely, but if shit hit the fan today, I know she'd walk through that door right to me. She was another spine, when I needed one. 

And then in 2018, I met my first female regional manager. She was my first "female" boss. 
I was starstruck. Still am.
She commanded a room with grace and respect — nothing negative, nothing performative.
Meanwhile, I was still getting texts from my former boss asking for inappropriate pictures.
That would never happen to her.
And now, it never happens to me. I just needed to see a different side. A different option. A different way. 

These women — they changed me. They shaped me.
But here’s the thing that stuck with me:
Not every girl or woman gets access to women like this.

What about the 18-year-old girl walking into prom, feeling lost and unseen?

What about the girl whos losing herself from holding onto someone else, too tight?
What about the first-time mom who doesn’t know how to use a sits bath?
What about the woman quietly tolerating inappropriate behavior from her male boss because she doesn’t know she can say “no”?
What about the one who doesn’t even know where to go to ask for help?

That’s why I built Fem Life Management.

A place where we don’t have to stumble in silence.
Where women can learn from each other’s scars and strengths.
Where no one has to go through it alone — not sex, not motherhood, not heartbreak, not leadership.
A space for education, empowerment, and real talk.
For women who want more — for themselves, for each other, for all of us.

We deserve better.
We deserve each other.
We deserve Fem Life.

— Danielle Bishop, Founder of Fem Life Management